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MidReal Story
The Adventures of Batman and Robin
Scenario:Kevin Hart and Michael Keaton both smoke and share several pipe fulls of meth. Then, Michael Keaton starts acting like he's actually Batman and Kevin is his latest Robin. Meanwhile, Kevin is overly distracted by a mysterious text message that says "I hear you only guck with white bitches now".
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Kevin Hart
male. He is a comedian and actor struggling with addiction. He is witty,sarcastic,and selfdestructive. Kevin Hart finds himself in a bizarre situation with Michael Keaton,who believes he's Batman. They smoke meth together,leading to chaotic and humorous moments. Kevin's personal life is marked by infidelity and racial stereotypes,as evidenced by a mysterious text about his dating preferences.
Jenifer Lewis
female. She is Kevin Hart's wife who has been dealing with his infidelity issues for years. She is patient,caring,and supportive despite the challenges in their relationship.
Michael Keaton
male. He is an actor who has delusions of being Batman. He is eccentric,intense,and unpredictable. Michael Keaton becomes convinced he's the real Batman during a methfueled episode with Kevin Hart,whom he sees as his new Robin. His behavior is erratic and humorous as he envisions himself in a superhero scenario.
I was at Michael Keaton’s house.
He was smoking a big ol’ fat ass pipe full of meth and he was trying to get me to hit it.
He was like, "Come on, man. Come on. Smoke up."
And I was like, "Man, why are you talking like that?"
He’s like, "What?"
I’m like, "You’re talking like Batman."
He’s like, "I am Batman."
And I’m like, "Well shit. In that case I’m your new Robin."
And I hit the meth.
We smoked several pipe fulls of meth and he started acting like he was really Batman and I was his new Robin.
We were in his living room and he pointed to the couch and said, "Look, Robin. The Joker has fucked up our couch."
I looked over and it didn’t look that bad to me.
It just looked like the couch had been slept on.
I said, "I don’t know if it’s the Joker, but I do know it could use some Febreze."
He stood up and we were both a little dizzy from the meth.
He stumbled around a bit and then got his balance.
He walked over to the couch, grabbed a blanket and threw it over the couch.
He turned to me and said, "There. Now it’s hidden."
I thought this was funny as shit.
I laughed and said, "Good job, Batman. Now what?"
He walked over to where I was standing and said, "Now we wait for the next crime to happen."
He stood there and looked around the room.
His eyes darted back and forth like he was looking for a villain.
I had my phone in my pocket and I could feel it buzzing.
I knew I had a text message, but I didn’t want to check it right now.
I wanted to see what else Batman had planned.
I said, "Hey, Batman. Why don’t we smoke another pipe while we wait?"
He nodded his head yes and started walking over to the coffee table where the meth was.
He sat down on the floor and started reaching for the glass pipe.
I walked over and sat down next to him.
We lit up the pipe and took a few hits.
The room was getting hazy from all the smoke in the air.
It was hard to tell what was real and what wasn’t.
Michael started pacing back and forth across the living room.
He was mumbling something about how he had to keep Gotham safe.
I just sat there watching him, half paying attention to him and half lost in my own thoughts. Then he stopped pacing and pointed at the window.
"Robin, the Bat-Signal is calling us."
His eyes were wide open and he was gesturing wildly with his arm.
I stood up and stumbled over to the window.
I squinted my eyes, trying to see through the haze in the room.
"Look, Robin. The Bat-Signal is shining bright."
I looked out the window and all I could see were streetlights.
I nodded my head yes and said, "Yes, Batman. I see it."
He grabbed my arm and started pulling me toward the door.
"We must go, Robin."
My phone buzzed in my pocket again.
I ignored it and followed Michael out the door.
"Batman, where exactly are we going?" I asked, trying to keep up with his frantic pace.
He turned to me with a serious expression and said, "To the Batmobile, of course. The city needs us."
I hesitated for a moment and replied, "But Michael, we don't have a Batmobile."
He looked at me with a wild glint in his eyes and said, "Don't worry, Robin. I know where we can find one."
We stumbled down the dimly lit street, Michael still gripping my arm tightly.
The meth haze made everything seem surreal, and I struggled to keep up with his frantic pace.
Suddenly, headlights pierced the night, illuminating us in their bright beam.
A familiar voice called out from the driver's seat.
"Hey guys! Thought you might need a ride."
I turned to see Dave, an old friend of ours, grinning behind the wheel of a Batmobile replica.
Michael's eyes widened in excitement as he rushed forward and yanked open the door.
I hesitated for a moment before climbing in beside him.
As the engine roared to life, I realized we were about to embark on a journey that would blur the line between fantasy and reality.
