MidReal Story
Unexpected Acceptance: A High School Journey
Scenario: Gay boy named Alex, a british school boy in year 11 who gets bullied then meets a boy.
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I hate this place.
I hate the people.
I hate the way they look at me.
I hate the way they talk about me.
I hate the way they treat me.
But most of all, I hate myself for being so weak and pathetic.
I’m in year 11, and I should be having the time of my life, but instead, I’m counting down the days until I can leave this hell hole and never look back.
The only thing that gets me through each day is knowing that when I get home, I can lock myself away in my room and forget about everything for a while.
Forget about all the name calling, the dirty looks, and the constant tormenting that goes on here on a daily basis.
Forget about all the people who make my life a living hell.
Forget about being gay in a school full of homophobic pricks who think it’s funny to pick on someone who’s different from them.
Forget about everything that makes me want to crawl into a hole and die every single day of my life.
It’s not easy, but what choice do I have?
I just need to keep my head down, stay out of the way, and try to blend into the background.
It’s my only option if I want to survive.
The warning bell rings, signaling the end of lunch, and I know it’s time to move on to my next class.
I pack up my stuff and make my way through the crowded hallways with my best friend, Jamie.
He’s a popular guy at school, and I’m lucky that he even talks to me, let alone wants to be my friend.
If it wasn’t for him, I’d be completely alone.
He’s the only person who doesn’t judge me, and I can tell him anything.
Well, almost anything.
He knows I’m gay, but I’ve never told him about all the stuff that goes on in this place because I don’t want him to feel responsible for fixing something that can’t be fixed.
I just wish he knew how much I need him.
We head to our lockers, which are side by side.
“Are you going to Sam’s party this weekend?”
Jamie asks as he opens his locker and shoves his bag inside.
I’m not really a party kind of guy, but Jamie loves them so I go along just to keep him company.
“I don’t know,” I say with a shrug of my shoulders.
“I’ll think about it.”
“Come on,” he says as he turns to face me with his hands on his hips.
“It’ll be fun.I promise.”
“I’ll see how I feel,” I tell him with a smile.
“Just like every other time,” he mutters under his breath before rolling his eyes.
I laugh at his response as I pull out what I need for my next class.
“You love me really,” I say with a grin.
“Yeah, yeah.I do,” he admits with a chuckle.
I watch him walk away to his next class before I head off in the opposite direction to mine.
As soon as he’s out of sight, my shoulders slump forward and I let out a long breath that I’ve been holding in since earlier today.
The morning was rough for me, and I’ve got a feeling that the afternoon is going to be even worse.
The worst part is that Jamie has no idea what goes on when he’s not around because I don’t want him to worry about me or feel like he has to take care of me.
Besides, if he knew what really happened here every day, he’d probably never leave my side which would only make things worse for both of us.
He’d get sick of all these pricks who think they can treat me like shit just because they can, and eventually, he’d end up getting hurt himself.
It wouldn’t be worth him defending me because that would make everything even worse than it already is.
I head into the boys’ bathroom, and as usual, it’s a mess.
The smell of piss and stale air hits me instantly, making me wrinkle up my nose in disgust.
The tiles on the floor are chipped and broken, and there’s graffiti all over the walls.
The school doesn’t seem to care about the state of this place because it’s always like this, no matter how many times they try to clean it up.
I go to the stall at the back and lock myself inside, just like I always do when things get too much for me to handle.
These days, it’s not how many people want to hurt me; it’s how many are here at the same time, and if they’re in a group, then that only makes it worse.
Today, it’s the entire rugby team, along with Owen and Jake who have decided they want to make me pay for something they think I did yesterday during PE.
They’re all outside the stall banging on the door and shouting at me to come out so they can kick the shit out of me like they normally do.
They know I’m in here because it’s the only place I go when things get too much for me to handle.
It’s not like there are many other places for me to hide from them.
They’re threatening to break down the door if I don’t come out, and my heart races in my chest.
I know they’re not just saying it to scare me; they’ll actually do it if they have to.
They don’t care about anything except making my life as miserable as possible because it makes them feel good about themselves.
The thought of what they’ll do to me if they get their hands on me is almost too much for me to handle.
They say it’s all in fun and games, but it hurts like hell, and some days I don’t think I can take it anymore.
I remember a boy who went to another school who was openly gay and the rugby boys found out and made his life a living hell for him.
They tormented him every day until he couldn’t take it anymore and his parents were forced to move him to a different school.
He left behind everything he knew to get away from these people, and it broke my heart knowing he felt like he had no other option.
It made me even more scared of being who I am because if they ever found out about me, then maybe my parents would do the same thing to protect me.
Maybe one day they’ll realize how much easier their lives would be without someone like me around to embarrass them.
My eyes start to sting with unshed tears, and I take a few deep breaths to try and stop myself from panicking.
My hands shake as I reach into my pocket and pull out my phone.
Please answer, please answer, please answer, I chant over and over again as the phone rings in my ear.
“Hey, you’ve reached Jamie,” his voicemail says.
“I can’t get to the phone right now, so leave your name and number after the beep.”
“Jamie!”
I say quickly before he can hang up on me.
“Please answer your phone,” I say as I end the call and call him back again in case he’s not looking at his phone but can hear it ringing in his pocket.
The bullies start banging on the door of my stall even harder when they realize what I’m doing and I drop to the floor and squeeze myself into the corner in a desperate attempt to hide myself away from them.
“Alex, we know you’re in there,” Owen says loudly.
“Come out and be a man or we’ll have to come in there and make you come out ourselves.”
They’re not going to stop until I do what they want me to do because they think it’s funny and it proves how little control I have over my own life when they tell me what to do and I do it without question.
How could I have ever thought that crying in a bathroom was going to help me?
I don’t even know what made me think it would be a good idea when it hasn’t stopped them from hurting me all of these other times.
My brain starts frantically thinking of ways for me to escape from this situation and I realize only one of us is going to leave this bathroom alive and it might not be me.
If I flush myself down the toilet while they’re not paying attention then maybe I’ll disappear forever and they’ll stop trying to find me.
The toilet is already broken because Owen clogged it by shoving paper towels down it last week, but maybe if I push really hard then I’ll be able to disappear through the pipes and they’ll never have to see me again.
The door of the bathroom opens and footsteps start echoing off the walls and my heart plummets because I know it’s them and they’re going to kill me if I don’t do something now.
But then I hear Jamie’s voice shouting for me, and a part of me realizes how stupid I’m being for thinking that he won’t be able to help me because he’s always tried before even though he doesn’t understand what’s happening to me.
The bullies must hear him too because they stop banging on the door for a second and listen for him coming closer.
“Alex, are you in here?”
He sounds panicked, and I don’t like it when he gets like this because I know how much he cares about me and I don’t want him to get hurt because of me, so I push myself off the ground and start walking toward him to get him to leave before they can find him too.
“Please go away, Jamie,” I say as I reach out and grab his hand before he can open my stall door and pull him away from it even though that makes them bang on it again because they know I’m not alone anymore and they want me to introduce them to my friend on the other side of it.
“I don’t want them to get you too.”
He looks at me with wide eyes and shakes his head as he grips my hand tightly and pulls me toward him before wrapping his arm around me and pulling me close to his chest.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he says softly as he wraps his other arm around my waist and pulls me into a tight hug while ignoring my protests to let me go because I don’t want him to get hurt because of me.
