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Storia MidReal
Fartgate: A Whirlwind of Windy Consequences
Scenario:I farted.....and my whole world was turned inside out.
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Johnathan "John" Fartley
accidental farter, friends with Mary and colleagues with Tom, average build, brown hair, mildmannered.
Mary Whiffington
supportive friend, friends with John and colleagues with Tom, petite, curly red hair, energetic.
Tom Stenchfield
coworker and witness to the event, colleague of John and Mary, tall, balding, skeptical.
Chapter 1
I was in a meeting at work when I accidentally let out the biggest fart of my life.
It was so loud that everyone heard it, and they all knew it was me.
I was mortified, but I tried to pretend like nothing happened.
I even kept talking as if everything was normal.
But then I looked up and saw the horrified looks on my coworkers’ faces, and I knew there was no coming back from this.
I quickly excused myself from the meeting and ran to the bathroom, where I locked myself in a stall and cried for the rest of the day.
The next morning, I woke up to find that a video of my fart had gone viral on social media.
People were sharing it all over the internet, and it had already been viewed millions of times.
My face turned bright red as I read through some of the comments:
"Whoever smelt it dealt it!"
"Looks like someone needs to lay off the beans!"
The last one hit me the hardest, because that was exactly what I had done.
I had tried to play it off like nothing had happened, even though everyone in the room knew better.
And now millions of people were watching that humiliating moment over and over again.
But as embarrassing as this whole situation was, it was about to get much worse.
Because I had no idea how quickly things were about to spiral out of control.
It started with a few unkind comments on the video.
People were making fun of me for being "the guy who farted in a meeting."
But then things took an even darker turn when my girlfriend watched the video and promptly broke up with me, convinced that I had done it on purpose for attention.
I couldn’t believe how quickly my life was falling apart over one little fart.
But just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse, they did: My boss called me into his office and informed me that because of all the negative attention this incident was bringing to our company, I was fired.
This was without a doubt the most humiliating experience of my entire life.
I spent the rest of that day holed up in a bathroom stall, too mortified to face anyone.
Every time someone walked into the bathroom, I held my breath until they left again.
I felt like such an idiot — how could I have been so stupid?
If only I could go back in time and do something differently…
My phone began to ring.
For a moment I considered not answering it — who would be calling me at this time of night?
But then I saw that it was Mary, my coworker and one of my closest friends.
She had been in the meeting with me when I let out that earth-shattering fart.
I took a deep breath and answered the phone.
"Hey," I said, trying to sound casual.
"Are you OK?" she asked right away.
"I heard about what happened. Is there anything I can do?"
The last thing I wanted to do was talk to anyone about this.
The only thing I wanted to do was crawl into a hole and hide until everyone forgot about what had happened.
But something about Mary’s concern touched me, and despite myself, I found my eyes beginning to well up with tears.
"I’m fine," I said hastily.
"It’s really not a big deal."
"Are you sure? You seemed pretty upset." "It’s just… embarrassing. That’s all."
Mary sighed.
"Well, if you need someone to talk to or anything, I’m here for you. OK?"
"OK. Thanks."
We said our goodbyes and hung up the phone.
I had been in the middle of an important meeting with my boss and several coworkers when it happened.
At first I thought it was just going to be another ordinary day at work.
But then I let out the biggest fart of my life — and it was loud.
Too loud.
It was so loud that I knew everyone in the room must have heard it.
There was no way they could have missed it.
I felt my face turn bright red and tried not to make eye contact with anyone as I continued speaking as if nothing had happened.
Surely they would understand that it was an accident and give me the benefit of the doubt?
But when I looked up, I saw the horrified looks on my coworkers’ faces and knew that there was no coming back from this.
By that point I was so embarrassed that I couldn’t even think straight anymore.
I quickly made up some excuse to leave the meeting early and ran straight into the bathroom, where I locked myself in a stall and tried to pretend like this wasn’t really happening.
My face felt hot and my eyes began to well up with tears as I realized just how mortified I really was.
How could this have happened to me?
Was it possible to die from embarrassment?
Because if it was, I might just drop dead right here in this bathroom stall.
The rest of the day was pretty much a blur after that — I’m not even sure what else went on at work because all I could think about was how badly I wanted to go home and hide under my bed for the rest of eternity.
The next morning when I woke up, everything seemed normal enough at first.
But then I checked Facebook on my phone and saw that one of my friends had shared a video with me: "THE GUY WHO FARTED IN A MEETING"
I could feel the blood draining from my face as I looked at the thumbnail image, showing me sitting at the conference room table with an expression of horror on my face.
I clicked the play button and watched helplessly as the scene unfolded: My coworkers and I were sitting in a meeting, talking about something or other.
I didn’t even know what it was about because I was so focused on what was happening next.
Out of nowhere, this massive fart exploded out of me and echoed throughout the room.
I put my hand over my mouth and stared at the person across from me with wide eyes, trying to pretend like it wasn’t really coming from me.
"I can't believe he just kept talking like nothing happened," one woman said off camera.
The video ended there, but apparently that was enough for people to get the idea — no words were necessary to explain what had happened.
As it turned out, that wasn’t quite true.
And all it took was watching Mary whiz into action on my behalf for me to realize just how lucky I really was to have her as a friend.
Because while some people were content to sit back and watch the video, laughing at me and tearing me apart in the comments section, Mary didn’t hesitate for a second before defending me against all the cruel things people were saying about me online.
She responded directly to anyone who left nasty comments and attacked them with an arsenal of razor-sharp insults, each more creative than the last.
Mary even went as far as tracking down the IP address of one particularly persistent troll and DDoSing his entire network until he agreed to take down his post altogether — now that’s dedication!
Unfortunately for Mary, our boss Tom Stenchfield didn’t see things quite the same way.
He had zero tolerance for unprofessional behavior on social media, especially from employees who were representing the company.
"Mary!" he barked as he stormed into her cubicle the next day, slamming his hands down on her desk and making her jump in her seat.
"What the hell do you think you’re doing?"
She looked up at him with wide eyes and opened her mouth like she was about to say something, but no sound came out — she was too shocked to even defend herself against this totally unwarranted attack!
"How dare you speak to me like that!"
Tom shouted back.
"I will not tolerate any insubordination from my employees — especially over something so stupid and trivial. Mary Whiffington is fired."
Mary ran over to me as soon as she heard the news, tears streaming down her face.
"I’m so sorry," I said softly as she flung herself into my arms.
"He’s such a jerk for firing you for something so stupid like this."
"He said some other things too," Mary sniffled into my shoulder.
"Like how it was completely inappropriate for me to go after you on social media, and how he thought it might have been some kind of sabotage attempt on my part because we work together or whatever. Can you believe that? Me trying to sabotage your career?" "I can’t believe he would ever think that about you."
She shook her head.
"I’ve always been such a good employee around here, you know? I’ve worked my butt off for the past five years just so I could get promoted to this position. And now it’s all gone…"
I knew how much Mary loved her job — she’d been talking about nothing else ever since she got her big promotion last year.
But even after all this, she was still more worried about me than herself.
I couldn’t help but feel guilty for dragging her down with me like this.
Chapter 2
I knew I'd probably get fired too, but at least Mary would have a chance of getting her job back.
I had no idea what I was going to do after that, but I couldn't just stand here and let Mary take the fall for me like this.
"It's not your fault," Mary told me when I expressed my concerns, giving me a reassuring pat on the shoulder.
"You didn't make me post those comments. And you certainly didn't make Tom fire me for it."
"I'm so sorry, Mary," I said, shaking my head sadly.
"I ruined everything for you."
"Don't worry about me," she said with a small smile.
"I'll be fine. But you…"
She looked at me with sad eyes, leaving the rest of that sentence unspoken.
Tom Stenchfield, the boss of our sales department, took one look at my numbers and shook his head.
"Fartley, what happened to all those deals I told you to close last quarter?"
I shuffled my feet nervously.
"I’m sorry sir, I know you told me to sell more product — it’s just that the market’s been really tough lately. There are so many competitors out there vying for the same customers."
He frowned.
"That’s no excuse. You need to do better than this if you want to keep your job around here."
I nodded glumly.
"Yes sir, I’ll try harder."
Tom sighed.
"I hope so," he muttered before turning to walk away.
"And take a shower while you’re at it. You smell like crap."
My face turned red as he walked off down the hallway.
"Man, Tom is such a jerk," Mary said as she walked up beside me.
"Don’t worry about him — everybody knows he has a stick up his butt half the time. I wouldn’t take anything he says personally."
She gave me a reassuring pat on the back before walking off in the opposite direction after Tom had left.
"Thanks Mary," I called after her with a grateful smile.
"You always know how to make me feel better."
She turned back and gave me a small wink before disappearing around the corner.
As far as coworkers went, I couldn’t have asked for anyone better than Mary Whiffington.
She was always there for me whenever I needed help — whether it was with my performance reviews or going through a hard breakup with my ex-girlfriend Becky last year."Fartley!"
Tom yelled from across the room.
I winced, watching helplessly as he marched over to my desk with a disapproving scowl on his face.
"Uh oh," Mary whispered beside me, looking up at me with worried eyes.
"I wonder what he wants now."
I took a deep breath and stood up so I could face Tom more easily.
"Good luck," Mary whispered to me before giving me an encouraging pat on the back.
I gave her a small smile in return as she walked off to her own cubicle, leaving me alone to deal with whatever mess Tom was about to yell at me for cleaning up this time.
Little did I know, things were about to get a whole lot worse for me than I ever could’ve imagined — all because of one tiny little slip that set off a chain of events that would forever change my life as I knew it…
I tried to keep my voice steady, but it was no use; I was losing my grasp on reality by the second.
Tom looked down at me with a scowl and crossed his arms.
"What’s there to discuss? The numbers speak for themselves. You’re not meeting your quota."
"But sir, you don’t understand—"
"I understand perfectly well. You didn’t get the job done in time, Fartley."
He shook his head in disgust.
"I thought you were different from the other guys in sales, but I guess I was wrong."
I opened my mouth to protest again, but he held up a hand to silence me.
"I don’t want to hear it," he said sharply.
"You’ve had more than enough time to make something happen here. If you can’t sell our product when we’ve given you all the resources available to do so, then maybe this isn’t the right line of work for you." "But sir—"
I began helplessly.
"Save it," he said curtly.
"You’ve had an entire year to make something happen for this company, and you’ve accomplished nothing. One account in one year is not what I would call progress. It’s a joke."
He glared down at me from behind his desk with a look of pure hatred.
"And if there’s one thing I can’t stand around here, Mr. Fartley, it’s people who don’t take their jobs seriously. You’re supposed to be in sales, but I don’t see you making much of an effort lately."
My throat felt dry as Tom continued to berate me in front of all my coworkers.
The day had started off like any other until he called me into his office for my performance evaluation this quarter.
"What happened out there?" he growled.
"I thought I told you to meet your quota this time around. What are you doing wrong?"
"It’s not that simple sir," I said nervously.
"The economy has been in a slump lately — there are just no buyers out there right now."
He gave me a disgusted look.
"Excuses, excuses. The rest of our sales team has managed to meet their quotas despite these so-called 'economic troubles' you keep whining about. Why can’t you be more like them?"
I swallowed hard and looked up at him helplessly.
"I’m sorry sir, I’m trying my best—"
"Your best isn’t good enough! We need results around here, not empty promises that never amount to anything."
I could feel my face growing hot as Tom continued to glare at me from across his desk.
I didn’t know what else to say; he had made up his mind about me before I even stepped foot into his office.
It was only a matter of time before he handed me my pink slip and showed me out the door for good.
"Understand what? That you’ve been slacking off on the job? That you’d rather spend your time farting around and making a joke of this company than actually selling our product like you were hired to do?"
"You make me sick, Fartley. You’re lazy, incompetent, and a complete waste of space around here. How did you ever get hired in the first place?"
I opened my mouth to protest, but nothing came out.
Tom’s words felt like a punch to my gut, and I struggled to catch my breath as he continued to yell at me without mercy.
"And another thing — when was the last time you showered? You smell like something that crawled out of a sewer."
He wrinkled his nose in disgust.
"And lay off the burgers while you’re at it. You’ve put on too much weight lately." "But sir—"
I started again.
"I don’t want to hear any more excuses from you. Take your stuff and get out of here — you're fired."
Tears welled up in my eyes as Mary glared at Tom from across the room.
Mary’s face paled as she turned to look at me.
"I’m sorry, Mary—I tried," I said softly, unable to meet her gaze.
Tom scowled at me.
"You’ve got fifteen minutes to clear out your desk. Security will escort you out of here — I don’t want any more disruptions from you today."
With that, he turned back to his computer screen and acted as if nothing had happened.
I watched in disbelief as Mary was unceremoniously fired right in front of everyone.
She didn’t deserve this; she was my friend and one of the best employees I knew.
How could Tom let her go just because she stood up for me?
"This is all my fault," I whispered, feeling sick to my stomach.
If I hadn’t farted during that meeting, none of this would have happened.
Mary would still have her job, and we wouldn’t be in this mess right now.
Mary had been there for me since college; we met in freshman year and hit it off right from the start.
She was sweet, kindhearted, and always willing to lend a helping hand when I needed one.
When I found out we worked for the same company, I couldn’t believe my luck — finally, I had someone to talk to during those long, boring days at work.
We had been inseparable ever since, and I didn’t know what I’d do without her by my side.
She had always been there for me, but when I needed her most, she couldn’t save me from this mess.
I watched helplessly as Mary packed up her things and left without saying another word.
As much as I hated to admit it, this whole thing was my fault; if I hadn’t let one rip during that meeting, none of this would have happened.
I walked over to Mary’s empty desk after the meeting ended and slumped down in her chair, feeling lower than I ever had before.
One of my other coworkers gave me a sympathetic look as he approached me from across the room.
"You okay?" he asked gently.
"Is there anything I can do?"
"I’m fine," I mumbled, not bothering to look up at him.
"I just need some time alone."
I felt awful about what happened to Mary; she didn’t deserve this kind of treatment from anyone, much less our boss.
Chapter 3
The minutes ticked by as I sat there in stunned silence, eyes glued to the computer screen before me as I tried to process everything that had just happened.
My friend Mary had been fired, all because of me and my big mouth — or rather, my big butt.
She had been nothing but supportive of me after my fart incident went viral on social media; she stood up for me when no one else would and tried to make sure I was doing okay throughout this whole ordeal.
And how did I repay her?
By getting her fired from her job and ruining her life in the process.
As if things couldn’t get any worse, Tom had decided to take his frustration out on Mary even though she wasn’t at fault for what happened during that meeting.
I was the one who farted, not her; she shouldn’t have lost her job because of something so trivial and nonsensical!
I felt like a complete failure on so many levels: my professional life, my personal life, and now my friend’s future at this company were all in jeopardy because of a simple bodily function gone wrong.
I sighed softly and leaned back in my chair, running a hand through my hair wearily as I wondered if Mary would ever come back to this office again.
It didn’t look like she would be returning anytime soon, judging by the way she stormed out of here earlier; her eyes were red and puffy from crying, and there was a fierce scowl etched across her face as she glared at me with a mixture of betrayal and disappointment.
I couldn’t blame her for being upset about all this, but I still wished she was here instead of being out there somewhere in the city — alone, unemployed, and probably feeling more miserable than I did at this point.
Just then, I heard the heavy creak of the office door swinging open, followed by the sharp click-clack of dress shoes against the hardwood floor as someone began to make their way over in my direction.
I turned my head and watched her approach me from across the room, her petite frame casting a long shadow over the floor as she slowly shuffled along in a daze.
She was carrying a cardboard box in her arms, which was filled to the brim with various office supplies and personal belongings that she’d collected from her desk.
I sat silently and waited for her to reach me; I didn’t know what else to do at this point, other than brace myself for whatever it was she wanted to say.
With a heavy heart, I realized that this might be the last time Mary and I ever spoke to each other — either as friends or as coworkers — depending on how things unfolded between us during this awkward confrontation.
"Hey, Mary," I replied hesitantly, my voice barely above a whisper.
"How are you holding up? You doing okay?"
Mary shook her head sadly and set down the box before taking a seat in the chair next to me.
"I’m not okay, John," Mary said, her eyes brimming with tears.
"In fact, I think I might be the farthest thing from ‘okay’ right now."
It was clear that this whole ordeal had taken its toll on her — both physically and emotionally — and I couldn’t stand to see her like this.
Her normally bright red curls were frizzy and disheveled, as if she’d been pulling at them in frustration all day long; her cheeks were flushed with anger and embarrassment, and there was a defeated slump in her shoulders that I’d never seen before now.
"I’m so sorry about what happened to you today," I told her sincerely, my voice filled with regret.
"This is all my fault. If there’s anything I can do to make this right, please don’t hesitate to ask me."
Mary sighed wearily and ran a hand through her hair, causing her curls to bounce and sway with each movement.
"I appreciate your concern, John," she said.
"But the damage has already been done. Tom made it perfectly clear that he wanted me gone — whether you farted during that meeting or not — so I guess this was just the push he needed to finally get rid of me after all these years."
"That’s no excuse for what happened here today," I replied firmly.
"Tom had no right to fire you like that, especially in front of the whole office. You didn’t deserve to be humiliated like that."
Mary shrugged her shoulders and let out a resigned sigh.
"I’m used to it by now," she said.
"Toward the end there, I could tell he was looking for any excuse to get rid of me — despite all the hard work and dedication I’ve put into this company over the years."
I frowned slightly and shook my head disapprovingly.
"If you don’t mind me asking… how long did you know about Tom’s plans to have you fired?"
"Since last week," Mary replied.
"He told me he would give me until the end of the month to pack up my things and leave. But I never expected it to happen so soon! If only you’d warned me about what was going to happen during that meeting…" "I’m sorry, Mary," I said, bowing my head in shame.
"I should’ve told you sooner."
After a brief pause, I looked up at her with watery eyes and added:
"I really am going to miss you around here." "Ditto," Mary replied with a sad little smile.
"Sure," I said with a weak smile, feeling even more depressed about her impending departure.
And sure enough, when the clock struck five, Mary packed up her belongings and left the office without saying so much as a word to me — no goodbye, no wave, not even a friendly smile or nod of acknowledgment.
It was almost as if she was pretending like I wasn’t even there!
As soon as Mary was out of sight, I let out a heavy sigh and buried my face in my hands, feeling absolutely terrible about how things had turned out between us.
I watched as Mary Whiffington, visibly upset, left the office without saying a word to me.
I felt a deep sense of loss and regret as I sat alone at my cubicle, reflecting on the day's events.
My feelings were in turmoil, and I was uncertain about how to address the situation with Mary.
My thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of Tom Stenchfield, our boss, who entered the office after hours.
Tom walked directly to my desk, his presence still intimidating despite the casual setting.
He stood over me, casting a shadow that seemed to engulf me entirely.
"What do you want from me?" I asked Tom as he towered over me ominously.
"I’ve already apologized for what happened yesterday; what more can I possibly say to you?"
Tom frowned and shook his head disapprovingly, making a low grumbling sound deep in his throat — as if he was trying to decide the best way to respond without losing his temper again.
After a brief pause, he folded his arms across his chest and leaned forward until his nose was almost touching mine.
"See you tomorrow," Tom muttered in a low voice before turning on his heel and walking out of the office without saying another word.
Chapter 4